Thursday, September 27, 2012

No Distance!



Curt and I have a close relationship. We refuse to live with emotional distance between us. If something comes up which starts to push us apart, we work like a house afire until we figure out the problem and the distance feelings dissolve.
 
I am restless and troubled if I feel distance in any of my close relationships: with my children, my parents, my sibling, my friends, or my Creator, and I don't rest until I am at peace, unified in heart and mind.
 
With God, because He isn't physically here beside me, I sometimes get caught up in "now" stuff and  start feeling some distance developing. If that happens, I run to Him, eyes searching for His gaze, arms stretched for His embrace, heart longing for His approval and closeness.
 
Why was distance creeping in? I devour His word and open my heart to Him for examination. I want Him to show me what I need to do to stay close to Him.

I wish I never had to crawl back down out of His lap and go to my "now" duties, because that's when the chance of distance takes place. I know I must be about duties, and I know that I don't have to be "in His arms" to feel close to His heart, but I keep seeking to understand myself better, and to watch my thoughts and choices in those busy "now" moments so that I can understand His will and make sure the "now" stuff I am doing is what He wants for me.
 
I realize that I must be as determined to have no distance with Him as I am with my Curt and all relationships that mean so much to me.

I'm so glad He loves me.